Have you seen me somewhere before?

First posted 9-7-07

Man In Strip Club: [Richard Burton in cameo appearance] Excuse me, haven't *you* seen *me* somewhere before?
Michael James: I know the name, but I can't remember the face.
- What's New, Pussycat?

(though Woody Allen hated this movie, I love it. Mostly because Peter Sellers is friggen hysterical)

I saw a woman walking over to the gym today. Okay, I see lots of women when I walk over, but there is this one. It's the second time I've seen her randomly about campus. I am 100% dead positive, absolutely certain we went to college together. We were in the same class, and she did undergraduate research in a crystallography lab just down the hall from my lab. She's cut her hair shorter since then, but it HAS to be her. Next time I see her I am going to stop her and ask.

Yes, she's cute.

No, I'm not going to ask her out.

You see, I seem to have misplaced my testicles. Plus I assume any cute woman around my age is either married or seeing someone seriously. It's a good bet. I think my only recourse at this point is to wait for their first marriages to fall apart and pick them up on the rebound. Plus, I'm just not attractive enough to pick up someone off the street. I need time for them to get to know me and see there is something worth knowing underneath this exterior. There is, right? Right?! Is this thing on?!

Also, everyone needs to go read the quotes page from What's New, Pussycat? There are just too many good ones.

Dr. Fritz Fassbender: My father, the most beloved gynecologist in Vienna, before they took him away on a morals charge for indecent exposure at the State Opera House, said, and I quote: "Please do not take me away, I will not do it again."
Victor Skakapopulis: Brilliant quote.
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: He was a brilliant pervert.

Dr. Fritz Fassbender: You're grotesque!
Anna Fassbender: Lascivious adulterer!
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: Don't you dare call me that again until I have looked it up!

Dr. Fritz Fassbender: [leafing through a dictionary] "Lascivious adulterer... a man who is a lascivious adulterer"? What kind of book is this?

Posted by Coyote @ 09/07/2007 10:47 PM PDT
Well I don't care for Woody Allen (that's right!) so what does he know? Anyway, methinks you overthink it. I joke about how gorgeous I am but dude, that shit ain't true and I have pulled more than my share of yeehaw from the stream of goonya. Anyway, who the hell goes up tp strangers and asks them out? And would you really want to go out with someone that said yes to a total stranger? That's just odd. We will teach you confidence at TacoCon. We can rebuild you. We can make you stronger.

	Posted by Taco @ 09/07/2007 06:06 PM PDT
	I can't put italics in my posts? That sucks. Move to another blogging system. To hell with the inconvenience of migrating all of your posts... you know the whole world twirls about at my whim. No, wait... the world fucking hates me. That's right. I always get those mixed up.

	Posted by Taco @ 09/07/2007 06:04 PM PDT
	fett wrote: I think my only recourse at this point is to wait for their first marriages to fall apart and pick them up on the rebound. Is that why you haven't asked me out?