It's crap

First posted 8-13-07

I've been working on the novel a little.

It's bad.

Really bad.

Like, final season of Gilligan's Island bad.

I'm just hoping that the badness can at least serve as a scaffold later to put goodness in. When I'm less of a hack....so say 80-90 years?

Also, I may be breaking up with my girlfriend this week. After another shitty weekend of non-communicativeness I let her know that I'm really frustrated with the way things are. She told me she's been really really depressed (or how did she put it, "I'm not doing well" or something like that). So the facts as I gather:

1. She depressed as hell
2. She's been trying to hide it from me (probably so I won't worry)
3. She does love me (I have little doubt of this)

But I don't know what to do. I'm frustrated as hell. I at least feel a little better telling her that this stuff has been bothering me. But I'm sick of pussyfooting around her parents, of her dodging me when something is wrong. Playing the occasional kissy-kissy over the internet isn't good enough anymore.

But on the other hand, I really do care about her. And despite all the troubles this is probably the best I will ever get. Took me 28 years to get this far. Sucks when your best shot at love is a long shot.

Bah, enough of that.

Bah.

BAH!

Also, fuck Mondays.

Posted by Inga @ 08/14/2007 04:10 PM PDT

Dude, I'm not trying to tell you what to do, but I would TOTALLY support your decision to move on. Being alone is better than being with someone who makes you miserable, even if it FEELS LIKE you'll never find another person to be with. (That simply isn't true. I should know, I'm psychic.) And maybe next time go for someone who is actually willing to do it? Come on. We're all adults here. ZHOO CAN DO EET! Btw~ If you (or anyone else reading this) ever need someone to cheer you on in the ending of a relationship, COME TO ME. I'm really very good at it. Just make sure it's what you really want, because once I start you're... pretty much going to have to do it.